Thursday, March 31, 2011

Having a good time switching out tires!


Talk about finding something to do one random afternoon! Got a call from my boy AJ. He asked me if I would go with him to go get a new rear tire for his street bike. His bike had been acting up and he wanted me there just in case his bike took a shit. When we got to the shop we thought why not have a little fun before we switched out his tire! I had to make sure to bust out my little Kodak EIS that shoots in 1080I and my Canon Rebel XTI with a fisheye lens... 

http://www.vimeo.com/21770891
(Video of AJ doing the burnout!)


Pretty gnarly, shooting video and pics all the while keeping an eye out for the cops! 
Little shops like this one always do the best work that's easy on your wallet! 

Street bike work, promo work, and a little grubin! Not bad for a Wednesday afternoon! 

Double Doubles always hits the spot!

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Not Gone Just Moved On


Today,  3 years ago I woke up not knowing that my life was going to change forever. One of my dad’s childhood friends was having a party in El Monte his mom’s 80th birthday!  I was 16 at the time my older sister Britney was 20 and my younger sister Cydnie was 11. My older sister and I being 16 and 20 weren’t really stoked on giving up a Saturday afternoon to go to a family party, we wanted to hang out with our own friends and do our own thing. My mom and dad expressed interest in my sister and I both going so Britney and I decided to give up the Saturday to be with them. If I knew that that was going to be one of the last times I was going to be with my mom I wouldn’t have put up any kind of a fight to go, and I’m sure my sister Britney feels the same way. My mom and dad could never pry themselves loose from my younger sister Cydnie, the three of them did everything together!

My mom, dad, little sister and I showed up to the party in the early afternoon. Everyone seemed very happy and excited to see my dad and I wearing our sample A2R shirts. A2R was very much in it’s conception stage at the time. As I was checking out what was up and being polite saying hi to everyone. I kept getting the same reaction from everyone, "wow you got so big" or "wow look at that hair" referring to my mohawk. After walking around and being cordial I ended up in a circle with my pops and his friends. Ever since I could remember at family parties I would be standing next to my dad listening to him and his friends laugh and joke around. Britney showed up about an hour or so later with her boyfriend Scott and as usual they had to go threw the same process as I did when I first got their saying hi to everyone, before they could sit down and enjoy the party.

It was getting close to that time to sit down and grab some food. Of course my mom being the way she was before she sat down to eat, made sure everyone had what they wanted. While eating this meal I had no idea that this was going to be the last meal I would be eating with my mom. I finished eating and I looked over at my mom she had her head up against my dad’s shoulder and she looked like she was dizzy. I asked my dad what was wrong with my mom. I noticed my mom began to slur her words saying she was ok but it was clearly obvious that something was seriously wrong. My dad trying not to panic called me over to help carry my mom to our truck to get her to the emergency room. If it wouldn’t have been for my dad and I holding her up she would have collapsed. I ran to our truck and pulled it up as quickly as I could. We put my mom in the back seat and I sat back there with her. I will never forget that drive to the hospital! I was sitting in the backseat with my mom talking to her and praying to God that she would be ok.

When we pulled up to the local hospital in El Monte (Huge mistake on our part, but we didn’t know any better?) I honestly thought she was going to be fine. She was young, ate healthy, exercised and I thought we would be in n out of there within a day or two at the most.  The doctors ran a bunch of tests and the tests came back saying my mom had a stroke which lead to a brain aneurysm. I remember when I first found this out I could not stop crying. I was scared...lost...and confused. I never in a millions years thought something like this could happen to my mom and am sure everyone was feeling the same way I felt.

Everyday in that hospital seemed like an eternity…as everything seemed to be getting worse and worse. I can still feel the fear in my stomach, the confusion, the overwhelming sadness at the thought of losing my mom! My dad was spending the night there every night he wasn’t going to leave my mom’s side. After three nights in the hospital with little sleep, and no food, or shower I asked my dad to please go home and get some rest, we had to pry him away from my mom so that he could get something in his stomach, get some rest, and a shower. He didn’t want to leave us with my mom, because to this day he believes that my mom needed him more in that hospital, then she had ever needed him in her 24 years of knowing him! He wanted to make sure that if there was any sudden bad news that he would be the first to hear it, so that he could figure out how to tell us…his kids. I am sharing this three years later because I feel it is time to get these things off of my chest, and write about them, I hope to find major healing in what I am about to share.

The next night my dad and I were with my mom at about 3 or 4 in the morning. I remember my dad laying down in his chair getting a little bit of sleep, I couldn’t sleep as I had way to much running threw my head. I remember looking over at the machines that were hooked up to my mom, and I started to see my mom’s heart beats starting to climb higher and higher. I began to freak  out, I woke my dad and  told the nurse that something was wrong. All the sudden the alarms in the ICU  started going off and 5 or 6 doctors came rushing into the room where my mom was. I put my face up against the wall with my arms covering my face and I could not stop crying...my mom was dying right in front of me and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I remember my dad coming up behind me and putting his head on my shoulders crying telling me " its going to be ok she’s going to be fine". I think he meant that she was going to be fine now "in heaven!"  I couldn’t believe what I just saw. Its something I would never wish upon my worse enemy! My mom’s brain had swelled to the point of squeezing her brain stem down against the base of her skull which had caused her to go into cardiac arrest? I think at this point my dad had realized that my mom was now ready to be with God in heaven, but was not ready to share this thought with us…his kids.

The doctors were able to put my mom on life support. Mid day of the 19th my mom began to breath on her own again, although it was a slight breathing on her part…it was as if she was saying… “I’m trying.”  I remember being so happy I really thought she was going to pull threw and that this was all going to just be one real bad experience. As soon as we found out my mom had…had a brain aneurysm we all knew we had to get her out of that small hospital and into a better one. We had been working so hard all along trying to get her out of that small community hospital as we had quickly learned that they were not equipped to deal with the situation that we were facing. All of the ICU beds at UCLA, Cedar’s Sinai and County General Hospital were taken, there was no room for my mom!  It wasn’t until late that evening of the 19th that a bed finally became available at Cedars Sinai. We had her transferred there that night. My dad was not allowed to go in the ambulance with my mom, to this day we don’t understand why. Following my mom’s ambulance to Cedars Sinai with my dad was a drive I hope to never have to experience again. My dad did not care about red lights, stop signs, speed limits or anything else, he was not going to let that ambulance out of his site…my mom’s guardian angel must have been looking out for us, because after running three or four red lights and reaching speeds of up to 90 miles per hour, we made it to Cedar Sinai without incident.

When we got to Cedars Sinai they took my mom in right away and got straight to work running tests. The difference between the El Monte hospital and Cedars Sinai was night and day! I really do believe that if we had taken my mom to that hospital first she might still be here with us. We just didn’t know any better, it was as if we were on board a sinking ship and we were reaching out to the first line of defense, which in our case was real bad one, as that community hospital in El Monte was real bad!

 
As it began to get into the early hours of the morning on the 20th, my dad had been in with my mom all along, and was coming in and out of the ICU letting us know that he had not been told anything. At about three in the morning is when the Doctors took my dad into a room, and there a staff of four doctors and three or four nurses told my dad that there was nothing more they could do to save my mom. She was pronounced dead at 4:40 pm on March 20, 2008. The reason for the twelve hour delay in declaring my mom dead, was because just seven months earlier while on a trip to Denver Colorado with my dad for their 19thwedding anniversary, my mom had bought my dad some Monday Night Football tickets for the Broncos vs. the Green Bay Packers game (My dad & I are huge Broncos fans! Broncos lost)…during that trip my mom had decided to bring up the subject of death, and asked my dad what he would want should he die. My dad responded that he was uncomfortable with the subject and that they should focus on being happy being that they were there in Denver celebrating their anniversary. My mom insisted on letting my dad know that she did NOT want a funeral procession or anything that resembled a religious ceremony, she said that she wanted to be cremated, and she wanted her ashes placed into her favorite place to visit…Lake Havasu. She also made it very clear that she wanted to be an organ donor…this is why there was a delay on officially pronouncing her dead…the medical staff there at Cedar Sinai had to prep her for her life saving generous donation.

When my dad finally delivered the news about my mom’s death, I broke down in tears...I could barely breath, I could barely stand up…I wanted to die…it hurt so much, I felt hopeless! It felt like someone had just knocked the wind out of me! I couldn’t believe what I had just heard. My mom was gone...all these past and future events started running threw my head. My mom isn’t going to be there for me when I get married...my children aren’t going to ever get a chance to meet her...I’m not going to see my mom and dad grow old together....no more Christmas eve’s (my mom’s favorite holiday!)  ...my mind was going crazy. I was thinking all this and out of the corner of my eye I saw my mom “float” into the room that Britney, her boyfriend Scott, and my little sister Cydnie were in. I went into the room and saw Scott and Cydnie holding Britney because she was crying so much. I went and put my hands on Britney’s knees and said “Brit everything is going to be ok... I just saw mom in here”…she’s going to take care of us...she’s going to watch over us" I said this and I walked out. Britney later told me that when I put my hands on her knees she felt a very strong energy rush threw her entire body!

Its been 3 years now since my mom has past away. I can't really say things have gotten much easier or that I’ve gotten used to it because in all honesty I’m not sure if I will ever get used to it or if it will ever get easier. In a way I’m trying my best to accept it. I’m not really too religious, but I do believe that there is a God, and I believe that my mom is with him! but it is really hard to go on without her…everyday I have to look for something to be grateful for…I have to keep my mind focused on what is good, and sometimes that is easier said then done. My dad reminds us constantly that God has his plan, and that my mom’s death was part of his plan, and that we need to work at understanding that it was God’s plan and nothing personal. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of her...not a day goes by that I don’t wish I could give her a hug just one more time. She used to refer to me as her “sonny boy!” Its weird when someone so close to you passes away you miss all the small things that you didn’t pay attention to when they were around. I miss the sound of my mom coming down stairs in the morning...the sound of her car keys....the smell of her perfume and her coffee.

There is a little bit of happiness to this story as I did not write this to gain anyone’s sympathy…I wrote this to inspire!  The months following my mom’s death, everyone crying, everyone lost, everyone feeling sorry for us…seeing my little sister cry because she misses my mom so much…this hurt the most…we grew from this and did not dwell on it! Since my mom passed away it really opened up my family and my eyes. My older sister Britney has now taken over the roll of my mom, along with my aunt Melinda Noriega in Corona, these are the two ladies behind me now!

We don’t take each other for granted any more. We understand that anyone of us could be taken away at any moment. We have all locked arms not only to love one and other, but to pursue this dream of ours...A2R in memory of her! She was 100% down with A2R. She believed in A2R so much that she encouraged my dad to quit his last job so that he could put all his time and effort into this company. We work hard at supporting one and other and above all, we know that this…this dream that we call life can come to an end at any moment, with a blast of God’s nostrils…God could alter our day, in a way that anyone one us can wake up and get out of bed one day, only to not make it back to our bed that night!  

My family and I are going to make our A2R mom up in heaven very proud!

To end this blog I want to say thank you very much for taking the time to read my story. I hope my family and I motivate and encourage you to pursue your dream and to have something proud to live for!  I hope that in some way my blog might make a difference in someone’s life that might be going through something similar. I feel that my writing this blog, after three years…is healing, and that is really what my family and I are all about right now, helping others heal and in that effort hoping to gain some healing for ourselves. Dreams do come true so DREAM BIG!
-Mannie Jr

October 16 1967 - March 20 2008